11. De Ro gone for season after freak lawnmower / corn row accident
10. Montreal gets MLS expansion - League bans term "Tabernac!" from all stadiums
9. Strike at Carlsberg - supporters forced to drink own tears
8. Players forced to train extra 2 hours a day to learn how to pronounce Preki's full name
7. MLS labour dispute cancels season - Pro Bocce Ball League moves to BMO
6. Bitchy The Hawk goes crazy - dozens injured, pecked
5. Reality show featuring out of work footballer debuts - "Roaming With Ricketts" a ratings disaster
4. TFC promotions department lauded as local kids invited on-field to "Pet Julian De Guzman's hair"
3. Chad Barrett starts new "Goals For The Environment" charity - global warming rises by 20%
2. Canadian Championship shocker as Nutrilite Cup won by "Baltimore CSL Colts"
1. Chip Butty... is people!