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Monday, November 10, 2014

THE STARTING 11: Signs that this TFC season wasn't as bad as everyone thinks


Get used to it you cesspool reading vocal minority. You negative Nellys (see what we did there?) need to look on the bright side of life with TFC. Like... it hasn't been 10 years without playoffs... yet. And stuff like that! Yes 2014 may have dropped out of the unzipped Vanney Pack and hit the soon-to-be-Argos turf with a thud, but this season had some tremendous positives as well. Like so...

11. Michael Bradley's optometrist has finally gotten over his fear of staring at another human in the eyes

10. "Yo mama" jokes found new life late in the season

9. Tim Leiweke stopped showing up to fan events in a size "Medium" TFC track suit jacket

8. Projected intra-squad headbutting incidents fell well short of pre-season fears

7. MLSE saved a bunch of money on their car insurance

6. British Airways frequent flier miles are through the roof!

5. Chris Konopka didn't once climb the CN Tower in order to swat at bi-planes

4. We can go to sleep at night with the image of Julio Cesar weeping gently in a tiny towel burned into our minds

3. Zero invisible cheques signed

2. The Reds finally reached their goal of becoming a feeder club to one of Cyprus' top ten clubs

1. Managers were capped at two

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